2012 didn't work out so well in the blogging area

Let's try this again!
Blake left to live with his Dad on March 13th of 2012.  So, I realize now that I quit doing a lot of the things that I used to do.  One of the things I intended to do in 2012 is blog. I realize now too that blogging is another form of sharing who and what you are going through. Who am I kidding? I don't normally share that in normal, everyday life...what made me think I would do it in this form?  I am usually a pretty private person and don't tend to share details with anyone unless I am extremely close to you and really only after I've either gone through it, worked it out how I was going to get through it or if it's something that I find trivial.  After I've sorted through it all...I'm an open book. I sometimes don't seem to "care"' enough for people because I don't ask questions. I have the mindset of "If you want me to know, you would tell me."  So, it's not that I don't care...it's that I try not to pry because *I* personally don't like that.

2012 was a trying year and I feel like I went through it mostly in a fog/daze/out of body type experience.  After Blake left - I didn't lay around and waller in my pain, rejection and grief.  When I am going through something and don't want to engage in life...I tend to hole up in my house and do either nothing or get busy.  So, lucky for me 3 weeks after he left I had a Thirty-One party at my house on April 1st. I was a co-host with my cousin Kim.  It was a crazy party and thinking back...I was "just there". I knew right away though that I wanted everything in that catalog, so I had to sign up for the discount.  (I didn't even know what the discount was....haha!)  So, I told Amanda that I wanted/needed to sign up, but also told her "Now, I have 2 other businesses and I am only doing it for the discount. Please don't think I am going to actually sell - just to my friends and family so they can get the discount."  She politely said, "Ok-that's fine. I understand."
So....because there was this Incentive going on at the time where if I sold $1,000 in 30 days I could get my $99 back for the starter kit...I waited 16 agonizing days to sign up.  I booked my first party before my kit came in.  I had no clue what I was doing at that first party - but was more than halfway to the $1,000 mark when I left there and I also left with 2 bookings and another team member - the hostess Dawn Dean. Hmmm....this might not be so hard after all. Oh!  AND before this first party, my first team member signed up. (Jessica Jansen) So, once they both qualified I was a Sr. Consultant.  So, just for having that one party and also had my launch party shortly after at my house - I finished qualifying, earned more free product from Startswell incentive program, sponsored 2 new team members - I earned 25% commission, earned my kit money back $99 and also a $200 Sr. Consultant bonus.  This was so much fun. I remember laughing and laughing because it was almost too easy.  I was so busy being "me" and researching my heart out so I could maximize all of the benefits of all the parties and such that I looked up and it was summer and I had 5 team members and I was in "DIQ" (Director in Qualification). I really didn't know what all of that meant because it was just over 90 days from me starting this journey and everything was so new and fresh still.
There were low times - NO DOUBT- but God knew that I needed something to occupy my thoughts and time.  I can spend hours editing photos and yes, while that would take up time, it wouldn't occupy my mind. Editing is sort of "mindless" once you are used to what you are doing. I could spend all day editing a session and "do something else" altogether in my mind. So...with this...I was learning something new and He was growing me and stretching me in ways I didn't realize at the time. I'm sure I'm still not aware of all He is doing in me. I know that I am learning to put situations and people (my child, in particular) in His hands and say "He's yours", "this is yours to deal with" because I can't be there or I can't do anything myself to fix the situation. I am leaning on Him now more than I ever have.

So, the rest of 2012 was eventful in the 31 world.  I have accomplished way  more than I ever thought possible.  I no longer take photography sessions unless you are my family or close friend. (very limited) not because I love it any less...but because I don't have time! I have a goal with 31 and I'm not inclined to stop until I get there, unless God has different plans.

If this company, who bases it's whole premise of being on Him, how can it fail.  I give HIM all the glory for my success in this company...for without Him...I surely would have stayed in my safe place and never given this wonderful company a chance. I've said it before and I'll continue to say it because I believe it.
I believe that Thirty-One saved my life...who knows where this sad,rejected and heart broken Momma would be today were it not for this business!